My mother taught me to seek after truth wherever it is found. I think for this reason I have always loved religion. I believe truth, both secular and spiritual knowledge results from a curiosity of things. As a father, I hope to instill this same curiosity into my children.
Prayer, scripture study and pondering are invaluable tools for acquiring spiritual knowledge. I have discovered that sorting out spiritual knowledge can be a complex process; spiritual truths, emotions, traditions, habits and experiences get mixed together and make it hard to see. But occasionally I come around a bend where I can look back upon the vista and all the pieces come together and I realize how simple it is.
I was recently pondering the chasm that exist between my righteous desires and the reality of my behaviors. From time to time, while in heartfelt prayer a feeling of peace and renewal has washed over me. It is hard to describe but there was this sense of an emerging new person. However, after arising from my knees I have often found myself disposed to fall back into my old patterns, sometimes within only seconds of pronouncing amen. It was troubling. A deep sense of guilt would sweep across my soul. It caused me to dismiss and cast out those sweet moments in prayer. I mislabeled myself a hypocrite. But then I came to a vista that allowed me to see that my failed attempts were acceptable in the eyes of God. Sanctification comes through practice and practice results in a multitude of mistakes and failures. I have a few favorite general conference talks that speak on this subject: Until Seventy Times Seven and Latter-day Saints Keep on Trying.
I love these words from the title page of the Book of Mormon, "Now if there are faults they are the mistakes of men; wherefore, condemn not the things of God, that ye may be found spotless at the judgement-seat of Christ." In other words, sanctification comes through a process of overlooking faults or failures, even those faults found within me.
